What I have been up to...

I know I haven't blogged in a while, but I have been really busy.

-Elections are over and I am the new ASG President for Saddleback College. =)

-I went to the Phi Theta Kappa convention that I had blogged about earlier. I had an amazing time and learned a lot. I met many intelligent people that I learned a lot from. Our officers feel closer now that we have gone somewhere like that, so it was a very good team building tool.

-I also went to the Student Senate for California Community Colleges General Assembly last weekend. I learned so much about how our Student Governments are suppose to function. The General Assembly really opened my eyes and made me realize somethings that we can change in our ASG next year.

-I also found out today that I am the recipient of the President's Award Scholarship. Along with the scholarship, I received a plaque from the president of my school. I was called first and was in shock-- everyone else knew their scholarships when they checked in, however me and Delainey (the former ASG president) didn't know..

I have been realizing more and more of how blessed I am. I have been given many amazing opportunities this year but most importantly I have an amazing family, friends,a boyfriend and mentors to share all that with. I honestly and truly feel blessed! I also feel like all my hard work has paid off.

This year has been a really good year for me. I think one of the best years! I have gone from not caring about anything to being this person that I don't even recognize. Although I know that my journey is just beginning, I'm glad that I'm getting closer and closer to my dreams!

Social Marketing

What is social marketing?

The answer to this question could depend on who you ask. But in brief, the term was first coined in 1969 by researchers Gerald Zaltman and Philip Kotler who defined social marketing as a way to achieve social objectives by applying marketing practice (product, place, promotion and price). Social marketing is not merely communication or education, but is about creating positive behavior and attitude changes as a means to increasing social well-being and social responsibility.

Who is a social marketer?

My answer, anyone can be.

...Just a thought...

Ideas..

Ideas are born everyday–big ideas, little ideas, ideas born from one person and ideas born through thought and application. What makes one idea stand out from another and what makes the idea stick, gain traction and create a movement? Here are six words to help make ideas scale:

1. Fire: Someone recently offered me some good advice. The said the key to “success” was to always know your end goal. The more you fuel this goal, the more you’ll believe in it and the more you’ll believe in yourself. For me, it’s not just a case of knowing my end goal, but knowing why that’s my end goal. To me, the why over rides the what and is what will drive success. We all have goals–but why do you have them? That is the tougher question, and that is what will get you through the droughts.

2. Simplify: Life is complicated enough–people don’t need more complication. Identify ideas that simplify tasks (without the use of a 30-slide power point to explain it). Identify ideas that are focused.

3. Stop: We’ve heard of growing pains. There will come times that you may need to stop. This could mean that you need to simplify the juggling act. Or, it may mean that you stop a product line or stop the way you do something and find a new way. It could mean that you need to stop starting new ideas–and re-focus back on the original idea. As, if we keep starting new ideas all the time–then we aren’t committing to what our end goal is and are spreading the fire too thin.

4. Execution: My mom always told me, “Don’t try. Do.” Take two seconds and reflect on what you’ve been doing and what you want to be doing. Do you see how much “trying” sneaks up on us? Those that make ideas become realizations, just do it. There might be success and there may be failure. But they did it. They learned, and they keep on doing.

5. Build: There are an infinite number of ideas right? Well, there are perhaps just as many people coming up with those ideas. You see–lots of people are “ideas people.” Everyone seems to have the next big idea or the next big thing. Being an “ideas person” doesn’t mean you will be successful. If anything, this means you need to connect with more builders. Builders are people that have vision while also being able to plan and make it happen. Builders are the people that fill in the gaps, aren’t afraid of getting messy, and are resourceful.

6. Contagious: Be contagious–in your thinking, speaking, doing and giving. It’s important to note that being contagious happens naturally–it’s not forced. You and your idea can also be contagious without you knowing it–at any time of the day. So be on the lookout for opportunity, for fellow builders, and fuel for the fire, you never know what might happen.

Vote Melissa Fenerci for Associated Student Government president of Saddleback College

Vote for me on April 20th or 21st at saddleback.edu/asg

If you have any questions about my goals as president, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Human genes being patented????

I don't believe that any life form, "man-made" or not should be patentable. Monsanto vs Schmeiser in Canada comes to mind. Jurassic Park? This is an example of capitalism and intellectual property laws gone insane. Obligation to make monetary profit drives corporations to behave psychopathicaly as most would be diagnosed if they were treated as individuals, which is how they are classified by law. I don't agree with the idea of public bodies claiming ownership of life in this manner either. Are we forever going to live in the shadow of the kind of insanity that permits such gross miscarriages of justice? This is not even logical! No matter how you view it. This is only further evidence of a pervasive sickness in our society.

My grandmother...

Sophisticated, peaceful, proper, caring, and beautiful, these are all the words that come to mind when I think about my grandmother Oksan Alemdar. The first day I met my grandma was when I first opened my eyes. Even though I was a baby, I remember always feeling her presence. It feels like we have spent every waking moment together, even though sometimes we were apart for long periods of time. She wasn’t just like any grandmother. She was my friend. She always knew how to give the best advice-and let’s face it- even sometimes when I wasn’t old enough for the advice given. She taught me to make my own mistakes and realize things on my own pace. She taught me to realese my negative energy out on art(attached), among many other valuable life lessons. She told me her crazy life story and every single time I heard more details I couldn’t imagine myself doing the brave things that she had done at her age. (My mom is another person who I feel that with. She is so brave that I can’t image being that brave and overcoming the things she has overcome.) Whenever I looked at my grandmas’ face, I saw a map of the world… It seemed like she had been everywhere and done everything imaginable, yet she was a great grandmother, mother and a great wife. She was diagnosed with cancer (stage four) when I was a junior in high school. I remember a conversation we had sitting on my bed the day she told me and her refusing treatment. I’ve always thought I had been the one to convince her to get better and seek treatment. I’m not sure if that’s what really happened, but back then, it made me feel important to know that I had been a part of a decision like that. For a while, she was continuously getting worse, and it was like I was trying to block all the emotion that I was feeling. Those blocked emotions since been re-opened… and as soon as I could feel again, I wanted to make myself a better person. The inspiration that I got from her existence was important enough to change my life and it inspired me to be more like her. She gives me and my mother such strength to this day… When I first lost her, I thought about the all the graduations she'd miss, my wedding that she’d miss and me giving birth to my children…Now I know that she will be there in spirit and her life will continue to guide me in everything I do. Sometimes I have these moments where I’m celebrating an accomplishment, and in those moments I feel her presence as I felt it when I first opened my eyes…

PS: Don't forget to celebrate the imporant people who have changed your life.

PS (MOM): Please don't cry if you read this and remember the purpose is to celebrate a life well lived.

Cheers,

Mel

Body image...



“Mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest one of all?” Body image involves our perception, imagination, emotions, and physical sensations about our bodies. It's not based on fact. It's psychological in nature, and more influenced by self-esteem than by actual physical attractiveness as judged by others. It is not inborn, but learned. This learning occurs in families and among peers, but these only reinforce what is learned and expected culturally. In this culture, women are starving themselves, alternating between starving and gorging, obsessing, pounding and wanting to remove what makes us female: our bodies, our curves, our pear-shaped bodies. Societies standards for body shape and various media promote the importance of beauty. The media links beauty to symbols of happiness, love and success for women. Media portrays these images as achievable and real. Until women accept their body image, they will continue to measure themselves against societies “perfect image.” Media representations of body image contribute to social trends of unhealthy lifestyles. 

Female children learn to worry about their appearance from an early age. Huge quantities of girls between the ages of three and ten have one or more Barbie dolls. On television children are bombarded with commercials showing tall and thin women promoting dieting products and leading a “dream” life. Being exposed to numerous 
“perfect” female images leads girls trying to defeat their imperfections into their adult life. Parental messages about appearance also have large impacts on young girls.

I, for one, am not the tallest or the thinnest girl in the world. Actually I am quiet short. I dealt with some body issues growing up and know how it feels. But at the end of the day, I am happy with myself and the way I look. I can honestly say that “I LOVE MYSELF and MY FLAWS are beautiful.” I hope more young girls and women will have confidence. WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL!!!! No matter what size, color or shape…etc It is time to love ourselves!

For every college student...

The accomplishment of a goal is the result of a dream that has been realized. The question that many are asking in their youth is how do I make my dreams come true? It is a fair question, but many do not have the answer. In this entry, I will attempt to give all the readers steps that I have used to make my dreams come true. A dream, in order to become reality, has to be something you really desire to have in life or it will remain just a dream. In high school I didn’t know who I was, and I had no passion to attend school. I didn’t want much for myself but now I want to achieve a lot, and that I can achieve anything and everything I want. To make dreams a reality you need to do the following: Decide what it is you really want to do. This sounds so simple, but when you are making this decision you must determine if you will do this, even if you don't get paid. If the answer is yes, then you need to pursue this dream as a career choice, because it will never feel like work but you will always give 110%, because it is what you love doing. Find ways to get further training on what you have decided to do. The more you learn the more you will be able to produce in the area of the thing you love doing.--If you are a college student get involved in your school; I’m sure there is a group on campus that focuses on something you are passionate about.-- Write out a personal life plan outlining every step you must take to achieve your dream. 
A personal plan is an excellent way to chart your progress towards your goal, as it helps you to keep focused on your dreams, as well as allowing you to learn the necessary skill-set you will need to further realize your dream. Organize your personal plan into goals, actions, and results. When you do this you will see what it is you said you were going to do to achieve your goal, in a step-by-step format. Next you will list what actions you will have to take step by step under each goal to accomplish the results you desire. Then look at the results you are getting from the steps you took under the action phase. If these actions are moving you closer to your goal then you are on the right path, but if your actions are not helping you to get closer to your goal then you must change that action for another action and monitor the new results. This sounds so simple but without discipline it will not happen. That's why you must love what it is you want to do. It will take great desire to achieve your dream before you will take the necessary actions to make it come true. Dreams and goals are something everyone has but few actually achieve it. So it will take desire, determination, action, and perseverance to realize the desired outcome for your dreams and goals.There you have it; my plan for achieving your dreams and goals. It is possible for anyone to use this method and achieve their desires. The only person who can stop you from realizing your dream or goal is you. You must believe in yourself and you must believe in your dream. Never give up on your dreams or on yourself. Strive to start everything you dream about, and strive to complete everything you start.

FACEBOOK!

Facebook, the popular social media networking website, is filled with groups and fan pages that promote violence against women. Groups like "Let's kill all crazy women" and pages such as "Hitting Women" not only are offensive, but they clearly violate several points in Facebook's own terms of use. Yet, despite these clear violations, these groups continue to pop up. Simply shutting down the groups in question is not enough. The users themselves who create and/or join these groups need to have their Facebook privileges suspended.Please tell Facebook that they need to be more aggressive in enforcing their own policies against these groups.

Women's History Month Celebration

So, I planned a four day celebration for Women's History Month at Saddleback College. Honestly, I thought event planning was a lot easier then what I later found it out to be... It was very hard trying to juggle both my classes and planning such a long event. At times I felt like ripping my hair out!!! Even though I struggled at times--and honestly at one point I thought everything that could be going wrong was going wrong-- I realize now that I have learned so much from the experience. I learned to pay more attention to detail, I learned that it's not always easy to communicate with everyone and actually learned a lot about the women's movement. I learned not to be scared of being a feminist.. and became an activist! The two weeks that I was going crazy was totally worth the amazing people I met along the way and the amazing opportunities that I received from planning this event. (and I'd like to thank everyone for presenting me with these opportunities and believing in someone who's as young as I am) I would like to express the importance of being an activist for something you believe in... You don't have to be an activist for every cause, but even if you were to pick one, YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE and people WILL hear your voice. The most important lesson I learned from planning this event was that if you are loud enough, someone will hear you!

PS: I'd like to thank everyone who helped me with the event.. There were sooooo many of you who helped me and even did manual labor lol. Molly Grant, Marissa Geer and Lauren Notle: Thank you for all the hard work you put into the history walk. Jessica Ochoa: Thank you for being so attentive. Delainey Taylor: Thank you for dealing with me when I was going crazy over the missing packages.. you really calmed me down.

I know there is wayyyyy more of you who helped.. so thank you too.

Cheers,

Mel

http://www.lariatnews.com/women-s-history-month-celebrated-1.2187216

Gender roles

Gender role stereotyping and gender bias permeate everyday life. Children learn about gender roles very early in their lives, probably before they are 18 months old, certainly long before they enter school. The behaviors that form these gender roles often go unnoticed but their effect is immeasurable. Simple behaviors like: the color coding of infants (blue & pink), the toys children are given, the adjectives used to describe infants (boys: handsome, big, strong and girls: sweet, pretty, precious), and the way we speak to and hold them are but a few of the ways the gender roles are introduced. These behaviors provide the basis for the gender roles and future encouragement from parents and teachers only reinforce the gender roles. 

Toys, literature, media, and films also encourage gender roles. Males are depicted as "doing", while females are always "receiving." When girls act too aggressively they lose acceptance from their peers. Also, her peers also hold a strong impact on her actions. Studies show that men and women excel in certain subject areas, causing them to perform differently on tests. Men are shown to have better math skills while women are better with communication skills and orally expressing themselves. Even though some believe gender roles are a direct result of the human brain, there is insufficient evidence to prove it. So, it is through our culture that we learn these gender roles. Our culture has drilled an image into the minds of people of how the role of each gender should be played out. These gender roles are detrimental to young girls and young boys and there are consequences for girls and boys who don’t fit these roles. So what do you think after hearing the harmful side of gender roles? Gender roles, good or bad?

Conflict in romance...

As long as people have gotten romantically involved with one another, there has been conflict within those relationships. Some people argue that conflict is bad for the relationship and will ultimately lead to the demise of that relationship. Others argue that the conflict is good for the relationship and will help it to flourish. Conflict can be both positive and negative for a relationship. It can both help and hinder the relationship. No matter what stage the relationship is in and whether or not the relationship is being helped or hurt, conflict is always happening in different contexts. Conflict is also caused by numerous reasons. These reasons include a lack of interpersonal communication skills, low levels of trust, physical abuse, an individual's past history in relationships, and many others. Today I want to discuss three issues-- domestic abuse, controlling partners and insecurity leading to dependency.

Unfortunately, thousands of women are abused everyday in the United States. This abuse can be physical, verbal, or psychological. Women, by nature, seem to hold a higher sense of personal worth when involved in a relationship. From birth, women are taught by society to conform to certain expectations and definitions of what it means to be a female. Growing up, women always here phrases such as "That's not lady like" or "You should be treated like a lady". What does it mean to be a lady? According to most societies, it means that women are the weaker sex and are always in need of a man to take care of them. Men are taught, from birth, what it means to be a man. This definition is usually one of dominance and control. This is shown in phrases such as "I am the man of the house".

In many romantic relationships, one of the partners feels the need to be controlling. Men, by nature, have the need to feel that they are always in control. This is especially evident in romantic relationships. Some men however take it to the extreme. They feel the need to watch and control their partners every move. Sometimes this controlling behavior can turn into violent behavior. If a man, who is controlling, feels like he is losing that control, he will many times move to more extreme measures to gain that control back. A survey done on battered women showed that most women reported their partner to be controlling and restrictive before the physical abuse began.

Dependency is defined as the reliance of an individual on another person for the satisfaction of his/her needs. In this case, insecurity can be defined as relational meaning a person will have doubts and uncertainties about the relationship that he/she is in. Insecurity is a sign that a person is lacking a perceived need in their life. Insecurity would then be the counterpart of dependency as a person would be lacking something therefore depending on something else. When a person believes both that a relationship fills specific needs and that there are a lack of alternatives to fulfilling those needs a greater level of dependence is going to occur. Different factors that may lead to insecurity include the appearance of another person that the partner appears to have an attraction to, or a perceived lack of interest from the partner. Whatever the cause for the insecurity, it seems to always lead to a further dependence on that relationship. The reason for this is a fear of losing the relationship, therefore resulting in a further need for the counterpart to preserve the relationship.